rogerborg's Diaries
Print Story EPIC... uh, SUCCESS
By Rogerborg (Tue Apr 29, 2008 at 09:50:22 AM EST) (all tags)
I am now fully qualified to deliver pizza-pies on a Faggio.  Whole new vistas of possibility open up before me.  Should I ride for the horizon, or return to the stupefying safety of the cage?

(24 comments, 162 words in story) Full Story

Print Story What the hell, bikers? What the HELL?
By Rogerborg (Sat Apr 26, 2008 at 07:38:31 AM EST) (all tags)
I rode a 50cc 2 stroke scooter in Majorca when I was 17, and I've got 100% in GTA: Vice City and San Andreas.  This isn't supposed to be difficult.  Where's the Freeeeedom?

(20 comments, 302 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Welcome to the Stone Age of Discontent
By Rogerborg (Fri Apr 25, 2008 at 01:45:39 AM EST) (all tags)
Courtesy of a gaggle of greedy greasy goons.

What's that, you say?  Despite all the assurances, somebody has just realised that it's not just refined fuel in Jockland, but a third of the UK's total oil imports that will be shut off?  And it will take weeks to restore the power and thus the oil flow?  And the GGGGs are threatening to escalate the strike?

Oh my.  Oh my.

(54 comments, 398 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Attention automotivebicylist infidels
By Rogerborg (Thu Apr 10, 2008 at 03:46:12 AM EST) (all tags)
Would you recommend it as a mode of transport, or just a way to avoid finding out whether there's going to be a pensions crisis or not?

(31 comments, 253 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Design "Fun" Challenge: square the requirements circle
By Rogerborg (Fri Apr 04, 2008 at 08:50:52 AM EST) games design, do my job for me you lazy selfish hippes (all tags)
I have two conflicting requirements that I'd like to satisfy in Brace For Impact, a prospective game in which (in brief outline) starships engage in tactical combat in order to capture strategic territory.

The two requirements:

   1. On joining the game, or after being destroyed, a player must be able to enter a tactical combat within 60 seconds.
   2. Upon being destroyed, a player must not be able to re-enter the same tactical combat in which they were destroyed, with a fresh and fully functional starship, in less than 180 seconds.

(35 comments, 217 words in story) Full Story

Print Story At last, a Tory policy that I can get behind
By Rogerborg (Tue Mar 11, 2008 at 03:56:53 AM EST) (all tags)
Yoof to swear allegiance to Her Britannic Majesty, or else be shipped to Guantanamo, presumably.  Maybe even Ffestiniog.

If children refuse to take part, [some treasonous yoghurt knitter whined], "are they then going to be told or taught that they are somehow less British or less loyal or less patriotic?"

Well, for starters. Also, they could be assigned a higher tax code.

(34 comments, 751 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Drive by diary
By Rogerborg (Tue Mar 04, 2008 at 07:32:33 AM EST) (all tags)
Pointless, brief and unsatisfying.  But enough about married sex - let's have the diary.

(28 comments, 530 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Attention $THINGS_THAT_SUCK Infidels
Puzzles & Riddles
By Rogerborg (Thu Feb 21, 2008 at 04:28:32 AM EST) suck, sucks, sucking (all tags)
Attention American Knitfidels: you suck.  Our inbred hicks > your inbred hicks.

Do you suck, infidel?  Find out this vital information inside.  Suck film at 11.

(29 comments, 475 words in story) Full Story

Print Story OFIK + MCAWMTY
Wizards and Hobbits
By Rogerborg (Tue Feb 19, 2008 at 01:33:45 AM EST) (all tags)
Operation Fit In Kilt.

My Clicks Are Worth More Than Yours.

UK Terror Alert: SEVERE - an attack is highly likely.

(39 comments, 364 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Malaysians get Chinese New Year off? Who knew?
Working life
By Rogerborg (Wed Feb 06, 2008 at 01:11:34 PM EST) (all tags)
Apparently nobody in project management, because it's SURPRISE EXPLETIVE DELETED! time as we find out why all of our outsourced offices have stopped answering their IMs.

If you think that would have pushed our delivery dates back by a week, well, you're probably on the wrong blog.  Try Slashdot, where the zeitgeist is that things should happen the way they should happen.

Inside: spoilers

(24 comments, 594 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Prompted to ponder my own relationship
By Rogerborg (Mon Feb 04, 2008 at 09:14:37 AM EST) (all tags)
I think the wife and I need to have a little talk tonight.

(13 comments, 39 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Phew, you wouldn't believe the traffic this morning
Wizards and Hobbits
By Rogerborg (Wed Jan 30, 2008 at 05:31:10 AM EST) sweet zombie diarists (all tags)
Took me 18 months just to get back on the superhighway.

OK, did I miss anything?  Everyone's happy and fulfilled in in stable, rewarding relationships, right?

(80 comments, 784 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Yo, Blair
By Rogerborg (Tue Jul 18, 2006 at 02:33:18 AM EST) (all tags)

(33 comments, 293 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Boo, only one house
By Rogerborg (Mon Jul 10, 2006 at 06:51:35 AM EST) (all tags)
Huzzah, only one mortgage.

Otter madness, Taliban Top Trumps, oh, I dunno, something smutty about Ikea or chaps in skirts or something.  What am I, the Intro Man?

(19 comments, 597 words in story) Full Story

Print Story Ask HuSI: Home cooling solutions
By Rogerborg (Tue Jul 04, 2006 at 07:22:46 AM EST) (all tags)
Jings!  The White Face.  Crivvens!

Evaporative coolers; better than nothing, or worse than useless?

(25 comments, 119 words in story) Full Story